Tales of daily life from a 20-something Student from London.

Tuesday, 16 August 2011

Empire BigScreen Convention: A Lesson in Anger Management Part 2

So, if you enjoyed the awkward escapades that yesterdays entry brought to the party, I'm sure you'll love/cringe even more, at what happened to me on Sunday. I've opted to skip Saturday as, unlikely as it sounds, nothing bad happened to me! How about that! Anyway, on with the rest of the entry so you can all laugh at my misfortune.


After two days of pretty tiring work, everyone was at their wits end. More screens needed to be filled, and with Jason Momoa (the guy from Game of Thrones and Conan), David Tennant (Who?), and Warwick Davies, the dwarf from Harry Potter and Star Wars in attendance, it was sure to be absolutely Sergio Ram-os. 

It certainly was. Regardless, most of the day went well, until, just as we were about to retire home (/pub) we were called for one last job. Feeling a bit like Danny Glover in Lethal Weapon 3, I reluctantly agreed, and was sent to screen 6, with instructions to 'fuck off anyone who tries to wait outside for the next screening'.

Within minutes I had an overfilled screening of Cowboys and Aliens and a group of moany ten year-olds calling me a 'melt' because I said they were 'like, 2' (although one did get up in my grill and say 'actually, I'm 8', so top marks for him). I decided to take my life into my hands and confront the screen.

"Ok, so anyone saving someone else a seat, you're not anymore"

I thought that was perfect and I would silence the crowd, filling the screen and seeming like a hero to those people who otherwise wouldn't have got to see a shoddy action movie.

"What if they've gone to get food?"

...oh god...what if they have gone to get food? That's a perfectly legitimate reason.

"or the loo", another shouted.

I was crumbling. What do I say?

I won't repeat what I said, but my actions were commended, and the film was re-projected next door. Everybody was a winner.

Then I got very drunk as rounds of drinks were purchased, and sadly, mixed.

Just about getting over that hangover.


Ok, so being a film convention, I did meet some stars, so here's a rundown I'm calling 'Cock-Or-Not'. I'd also like some views as to whether that does sound like coconut, which was the gag.

David Tennant: Cock - Ignored my calls of 'DavTen' and looked unhealthily skinny. 

Dominic Cooper: Not - Had time for fans, and remembered names. Top boy.

Idris Elba: Not - Same as above, but absolutely stacked to the rafters making him nice and threatening at the same time.

The one who played Luna Lovegood in Harry Potter: Cock - Pushed passed me in a corridor, and didn't acknowledge my childhood crush I had on her. Yes, she was expected to know about that.

Jason Momoa: Cock - He may have been a nice guy, but wearing a shirt that's so far unbuttoned I could see his bellybutton, combined with Morpheus glasses and hair down to his bee-hind is not a cool combination. I had a nickname for him, which was Samoan Joe, but was too scared to mention it to him. 

And that concludes this two part venture into my weekend. I'm off to V Festival this weekend so you can guarantee I'll have an equally awkward weekend on my hands. 

Over and out.